Minimizing Misperceptions & Misunderstandings in Adoptive Families
As humans we often encounter misperceptions and misunderstandings.
People are naturally skeptical of things that are different.
Even prior to adopting you’ve likely faced misunderstanding and misperceptions due to your Christian beliefs or in other contexts.
In our adoptive families, there is often lots of fuel for the fires of skepticism, leading to flames of misperceptions and misunderstandings. These can even grow into a raging wildfire threatening to overtake the entire structure of the family.
Sources of Skepticism Vary
You’re probably familiar with some of the sources such as culture differences which occur in international adoptions, but also in others where cultural differences collide.
There are differences in the idea of what “family” means, the roles and responsibilities different family members have (or “should” have) and sometimes language differences within the adoptive family itself fuel misunderstandings. Mental and emotional disabilities or damage can certainly be a huge source.
Assumptions and beliefs that we’ve been holding may be challenged like never before.
Fears and misplaced mistrust can fuel a lot of misperceptions. A pattern of triangulation often develops in which previously trusting parents begin to mistrust each other.
Within the home, misunderstandings & misperceptions can be fueled by coping skills that were once adaptive for your adopted child but are now maladaptive and undermine your efforts to parent in a connected way.
Lingering effects from early childhood traumas can result in many misunderstandings and misperceptions from inside the family, and outside.
What makes your family stand out
as different than others?
All families are different.
But some differences may be viewed with more skepticism. What makes your family stand out as different than others?
It may be something obvious like skin colors that don’t match or not so obvious like your child always pushing you away during outings or “mommy shopping” at church.
It may be your well-fed child’s lingering food insecurity that shows up at school.
Or many, many other things that draw skepticism. 
It can feel like you’re fighting a blazing wildfire alone with only a small water bucket and that bucket has holes!
If you’re feeling this right now, feeling the heat of the flames, I want you to know you are not alone. Don’t be surprised.
Remember WHO you are and as a Christian, remember WHOSE you are. Recognize that you have stepped into a Spiritual Battle and that you cannot fight it alone (or merely on a physical battlefield).
And as always,
keep learning, keep growing & keep loving.
đź’ś
Dawn
______________________________________________________
Post Adoption (Mom) Coach
“STANDING IN THE GAP FOR 2ND MOMS”
Dawn Baggett is a podcaster and thought leader in Christian post adoption. As a Certified LifeMapping(R) Coach, Dawn helps Christian adoptive moms navigate the challenges of their non-traditional families with their own brand of success!
DISCLAIMER: I’m a coach, not a doctor nor a therapist. As a coach I do not offer mental or medical health diagnosis, treatment or cures. Furthermore, I am no longer a practicing attorney and do not offer individual legal advice. For individual advice related to your own personal situation I recommend you seek out an appropriate professional. Coaching may fill a spot in your overall support network.
—
Copyright © 2024 Dawn T. Baggett, JD & Legacy Living, LLC - All rights reserved
—
