Did you know that early childhood trauma often leads to a pervasive sense of helplessness in children?
This in turn can cause them to overcompensate with age-inappropriate independence and rigid control strategies.
If you're noticing these behaviors in your child, know that you are not alone, and together, we can find paths toward healing and connection.
Does your child or teen tend to overreact with excessive & prolonged drama or explosive behavior? Let’s talk about it…
WHEN THEIR OVERREACTING IS ACTUALLY A TRAUMA RESPONSE
…Today, we're diving deep into an essential trauma tip for adoptive moms. It's all about the ability to CALM DOWN – something that can be particularly challenging for traumatized kids. The key concept here revolves around understanding that their brains and bodies are not as efficient in down-regulating from a heightened state of amygdala activation.
Today’s topic is emotional boundaries.
In particular on this episode I’m focusing on emotional boundaries for moms like me. In many of our adoptive families children have suffered an enormous degree of trauma and in particular the loss of not only their first mother but other caregivers as well in their formative years.
Different Types of Boundaries
You’ve seen & heard quite a bit about setting boundaries by now I suppose. And perhaps you have a good grip on what it means to set personal boundaries with others, and have even put this into practice in your own life. Even so, to make sure that we’re on the same page today, you need to know that what I mean by the word “boundaries” is that dividing line (boundary) you make to protect something of yours from trespass by another that says you will not continue past that line (boundary) with the other person. In practice it may sound something like, “I will not continue listening to you yell obscenities at me;” a boundary to protect your finances might sound like, “I will not continue paying you while your work is unfinished;” one to protect property – “I won’t leave without locking the door first”; one to protect physical safety – “I won’t stay in the house where there are unsecured weapons.”
With all these various boundaries to protect different things, there may be an emotional component. But today I want us to pick apart and focus primarily on emotional boundaries. You may set boundaries to protect your time, your physical body, your work/ability to get work done, your belongings. You can also set boundaries to protect your emotional safety.